Today stinks.
I'm really pissed off thanks to a certain CCA teacher who blatantly signed some of the Part Cs up for Flag Day when it's evident that we're already lacking in manpower. Not only that. News of the CCA Display was a teeny bit too late for comfort that everything has to be
rushed.
Oh how stressful it was to be pressurised by everyone to make a stupid brochure which is not even completed yet thanks to this immense amount of stress that has been pounding me since last night. And thanks to that, I could barely wake up this morning.
I gave up on the brochure way long before that because I anticipated that it is not really needed. And I was right.
3 people down. 1 person at VELOCI-T. 1 person busy with a wedding. 2 people hopeless. And then there were 3.
Even though nothing much happened during the Open House itself because no one actually bothered to look at our booth, preparation was really rushed. And I'm actually glad that at least Farhan and Hasif helped out this morning before heading for their Flag Day to make the photo montage. Thanks guys. Hugs to ya both.
And yeah. Blame me. For simply being so lazy and giving up to make the brochure. For being too lazy to get my ass off from my bed and head to school before 8 or the least bit before Open House started.
Hah. Remind me to actually finish the brochure before Sec 1 Orientation. Another CCA Display. -.- Or is it during Sec 1 Registration? Either way, it is still waiting for me to complete and to be printed by Mid December.
But why am I really bothering. I know that deep down within me, I can't wait till I can step down from my CCA so that I can finally let go off all these stress. And even deeper, I can't wait till my CCA closes down. And it's really evident that it's gonna close down sooner or later. Just look at the evidence; more than 50% of the Sec 3s are in ESP/Boot Camp, juniors are slacking, disciplinary problems quite high, especially since Mr Chia knows
some of our names and that the lone prefect in the CCA could do anything to help it.
And what about me? Shouldn't I help? Hah. As if. It's too late for that. Even my 9-point L1R5 couldn't save the CCA from impending doom. I'm the least bit bothered to help people who couldn't even realise that he is being helped. Playful and the least bit serious when it's time to be serious. We can only get serious when CLTs are frowning on our faces from above, or when it's
too late.
I got a phrase for this.
Blinded by the PSP. And it's true.
Yes, I appreciated them, or at least a few of them, for actually bothering to help. Unlike the rest, who just sit on their stupid asses in front of the computer screen defending the ancients.
So c'mon. Close down already ya stupid shit.
[ EDIT ]After drowning myself in my reflection toilet for an hour, I just realised something; I
may have been too harsh. But then again, whatever I blurted out above is my thoughts and what I felt towards a part of my life. And
nothing can change that. Nothing.
I just found out that Prof Test is on the 15th of November. And guess where I will be? In banana Japan. I'll be blissfully wasting my time learning how did Japan recover to such an advance technological state after their devastating experience in World War II.
Hah. Why should I care about Prof Test anymore. It's just for a stupid badge, which is merely an upgrade from my Silver Proficieny Test. And why bother collecting more badges when we'll be stepping down somewhere in March or April, which will be the last time we'll be wearing those badges, or even the No. 3 uniform. What will be left is just memories tucked away within all these things. Horrid memories.
But I digress. There's no point collecting things when you know things are gonna be over soon. Like when you know you're about to die and you have climbed up Mount Everest, there's nothing else great enough for you to do. So why not just sit back and relax, and reflect on your 69 years of life.
The test also adds on unneccessary stress and worries. You'll be required to learn about these stupid things of which have no use in your future life, unless you become a Seaman, which I'll never plan on being one, ever, never. What does a Port Lateral Marker do? What's the meaning of Abreast? When is the First Dog watch? All these useless information not required to be memorised, simply wastes your brain capacity. And trust me, nowadays, the brain capacity is full whenever someone is 1.
The test is for promotion you say? Well, I'll simply reply, What Promotion? I already wasted 3 days of my life in Senior Spec Course to
earn my Staff Sergeant rank. And there's no possible way for me to be promoted to Master Sergeant because that rank is reserved for the USM and ASM. So why should I bother doing the test of which gives me no promotion, and a 20% chance of getting a new badge upgrade.
I don't see the point in CCAs anyway. They're just there merely to cut 2 points off from your L1R5 so that you can enter a JC or Poly of your preferred choice. You can say that CCAs are meant to bond people together. But aren't there other ways to bond people? Like Class activities, MT class, after school activities, etc. You can also say that CCAs can build up on your leadership capabilities. But this is only done is VS. Think about other schools, or simply think about certain Sport CCAs in VS, or even some of the Clubs & Societies.
Not pointing any fingers, but some of these CCAs hardly have any hints of moulding the leadership potentials within someone. Think about it. Some of these CCAs even have disrespect between juniors and seniors. Seniors getting bullied by juniors. Juniors stepping over seniors' heads. Do you call this moulding leadership?
I for one think that CCAs are a waste of time. What you need is just the drive to excel academically and in your characteristics. One way to mould this is CCAs, but there are other ways. Better ways.
CCAs have known to be the cause of stress in many. And stress in inevitable in plenty of things. So why bother adding on to the burden?
Think about it.
I'd rather just have simple Student Organisations and normal after school activities with your peers.
Creep
by Radiohead
When you were here before
Couldnt look you in the eye
Youre just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
Youre so fuckin special
But Im a creep, Im a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.
I dont care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When Im not around
Youre so fuckin special
I wish I was special
But Im a creep, Im a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.
Shes running out again,
Shes running out
Shes run run run running out...
Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
Youre so fuckin special
I wish I was special...
But Im a creep, Im a weirdo,
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.
I dont belong here.
... 2:21 pm
Such popularity! 
